Poem: I do not trust myself

I do not trust myself

but I don't trust
anything else, really,
not in this case,
and maybe it is not trust,
maybe I do trust myself,
but I learned this,
learned something
I can't let go of
even now that it is bad
for me, is harming me,
limiting, restraining,
I can still raise up, I think,
can stand and walk
and begin, maybe.
I do not know.
I think there is a path,
but I do not know
and I am not certain.
I need to decide
if I am ready for that,
and I know
I should be,
but that is not enough,
even if I wish it were.

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