A Writer's Notebook, Day One-Thousand-Three-Hundred-And-Twenty-Two

I had wanted to get to bed early tonight, but it is already too late for that.  It took me a bit to get settled in with my writing tonight, as can happen at times.  Everything is so draining these days, and I don't really know that their is much to be done about most of it.  I know I need to make things better for Melissa and I, as I have discussed before.  I have to take and do things, but I don't know what, that is in my power, I can really do.  The best I've been able to manage thus far is just attempting to keep my feelings in check around her, and just letting certain things go with members of my family, even when it is not okay with me to do that.  I am not sure how successful that strategy really will be for me.  I don't know.  I need to do what I must, though, if only to make things better for Melissa.  It has been hard on both of us, I know, and I may not be able to help myself in any real way right now, but that doesn't excuse my not doing what I can for her well-being.  In the end, I have to hope that making changes to improve things in ways she will appreciate will have some real impact for me, but, if not, at least I can make her happier, which matters to me a great deal.

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