A Writer's Notebook, Day One-Thousand-One-Hundred-And-Fifty-Five

I have been finding it difficult to focus on larger pieces of writing lately.  I have ideas for stories, novels, essays, all sorts of longer works that I want to get written, but I am not having a lot of success in doing it.  When I say longer works, I should be clear that, while some are ideas I think might be substantial enough to be books, longer is, in this case, is not that lofty.  Most of my poems are less than a page, and even those that go past that limit are usually penned in a sitting.  That is the place where I might be struggling right now: keeping that focus and energy over a longer period of time when I must hold it between writing sessions.  I think a large part of the issue is related to my feeling a bit drained at present.  Things have been rough, and I feel very stuck right now.  I feel as if I am working and working with nothing to show for it, and that makes it difficult not to feel a bit put off about the work.  With a single poem, I can just push through, but it takes a greater degree of effort to sustain focus on a longer piece, at least for me.  I want to be able to do this work, but I need to find a real motivation for it, one that includes an actual sense that the work isn't just another large effort that is going to sit here on my computer.  I am overwhelmed right now, and it is keeping me from getting to this more challenging work.  I want to push myself in those ways, to create what I believe I can, but I am not finding that energy in myself with things as they are right now.  If only I could do something to get through this, but I have been stuck here for so long and never seem to be able to move past it.  I am sick of it, but it does not change.  Each day, as this continues, I feel like I am breaking, bit by bit, more and more.

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