Poem: No Rats Guaranteed

No Rats Guaranteed

We are very proud to say
that we can be certain
there are no rats here,
as we have a great number
of mice in our premises,
and the mice are quite clear
that they will not share their home
with even a single rat,
so. by order of the management
all the vermin here
are mice, that is all
that we have around,
and if you have cheese
that is stolen, you can be calm
in your absolute assurance
who it was that took it,
can have confidence
it was not taken
by any impostors,
though I have been told
mice much prefer
many things that are not cheese,
but I think the ones we have
know it is best
to keep up appearances.

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