Poem: I have said I would

I have said I would

or would try, at least,
and I did at least that much,
but you won't know
or recognize it
because it was nothing
more than an effort,
nothing but that,
because I failed,
which I am fine with,
or I say that I am,
even though
I do want it
to be done.
I don't have it,
not right now.
I will have to own that.
I know what I said
but I will have to be clear
about the state of things.
That is what scares me,
not the failure itself
but the admission.

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