Poem: I am ignoring it

I am ignoring it

which is not blissful at all,
if you want to know.  It is
always there, even
if I am not trying
to notice or think about it
or be even a bit aware
of what is happening,
but I do know,
I am not able
to keep from knowing
that it is happening,
even if I am ignoring
all the details.
I don't think
it would be better,
really, to know them.
I cannot do anything
to change things
and there is nothing
to do but wait,
whatever is happening
and whatever
comes of it.
I just wish
ignoring it
actually helped,
even if only
in terms of 
my own anxiety.

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