Poem: If it is to happen

If it is to happen

First, you must understand:
it scares me.  It is not
what I want to do,
and I know
it will not go well,
will not go right,
if I can't do it
with care,
with intention.
It must be more,
must be better.
I know that.
I understand
what is required,
and I need to know
it is possible,
that when you speak
of caring and being present,
that it is not only words,
that you can mean them
in a way
that will matter
for me,
and not only
the one
that soothes 
your ego.

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