Poem: I must have understood

I must have understood 

or I would not have said
what I did.  I was not aware
but was responding, perhaps.
It is not clear to me.  I may be 
an asshole to you, if it is what I imagine,
but I was confused, but part of me knew, too
a part that put it there and I said 
what was just what bad been there.
Maybe I am the terrible one.
I did not process it to consciousness.
I realize it now, later than too late.
I cannot do anything but apologize
and that would be quite awkward for me.
I need to.  I am certain you will say nothing
or say it is nothng,
but it is not.  It is more.  I recognize it, now.

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