Poem: I Do Not Think Their Is So Long As That

I Do Not Think Their Is So Long As That

I am not going to pretend that is reasonable.
I know the way things are, how I have done
and what I have been.  It is a difficult matter,
is not easy, not for me it isn't, has never been.
To make it better would be great, but isn't real.
I have not found that pathway, do not know it exists.
To believe in it feels silly at this point, foolish.
I don't trust in such things now. 
Maybe that is freedom, or a freedom.  I do not know.
It could be I was free when I thought it was possible,
when I believed in the chance.  Now, I am doomed,
perhaps.  I do not know.  It is not simple.
I know what I think tonight, but
I cannot speak for myself tomorrow. 

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