Poem: After

After

You made those promises,
guaranteed you would be here,
would help, would prepare me,
would guide, would assist, even.
There would be opportunities,
you said.  I recall the words,
do not think I do not know
what was said, do not think
I can be confused,
can come to believe it is me,
is a fault in my mind,
that I misconstrued.
I know what was said,
what was promised.
It was all clear.
What am I to do now?
What is there, can you say?
None of it has come,
nothing was done.
What did I do
to slip away
from your care?
I know so many others,
too many of them,
who you retained,
nurtured, continued to care for.
I was left behind,
left to be alone.
I do not know why.
What am I to do now?
You are gone,
and I am here,
still waiting, still needing
what it was you offered,
what I was certain of.
Was it already too late
even before?  Had I done something,
to cut me from consideration?
There will be no answers,
just as with the rest,
it is too late for anything,
but I continue still,
even if it is too late:
what else am I to do?
You were the only one
I can think of
who might have offered
an answer of value.

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