Poem: What Should I do?

What Should I do?

When I call 
a few times in a week,
I call too often,
but if I stop,
you are angry
I have not called,
and if we have dinner
and I offer to help
getting this or that
from the shelves,
you show annoyance,
exclaim it will be easier
if I stay away,
but if I do not offer,
you make clear
that I am being selfish,
lazy, useless,
that you deserve better.
When I invited you to poetry readings,
you were put out
that I was demanding your time,
but when I learned the lesson,
you learned of another reading
I planned to attend,
were offended at needing to ask
for an invite.  
There are patterns in our interactions
that hurt me.
I know, you will say
I am wrong,
there is no pattern
each example is unique,
is nothing like any other case,
was a specific response
to that one condition,
that my experience
of it being the same
is just my bias.
I cannot say
if you truly do not see it,
if it is just too deep inside,
or is it intentional?
I do not know.  I do not know
if it would be better to know,
but I want to understand why
you define the desired behavior
I should have engaged in
so it always will match
what I have not done.

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